Most people benefit from therapy, but some do better than others.
What is the secret you may ask? And is it all about the client?
Matching with a good therapist is important, but when the client does not have what it takes, the practitioner’s education and clinical experience means little.
Therapy process is a journey the client and therapist take together and they form the 2 essential ingredients necessary for that transformation that has brought the client into that space in the first place.
So what is it that the client needs to get the best out of this process? And why some people do better than others?
The 5 types of people that do weel in therapy and succeed in their self-discovery, healing and personal growth journey have these basic attributes:
THEY ARE CURIOUS AND INQUISITIVE
Clients that are interested to find out more about themselves, their families, the other people and the world surrounding them stay more engaged with the process and have a lower rate of drop out. They usually ask questions, do a lot of self-reflection in between sessions and reach deeper levels of understanding and insight.
THEY ARE OPEN AND TRANSPARENT
People that are able to trust their therapist and feel comfortable to share their inner worlds with the therapist speed up the self-discovery and healing process, and grow and develop much faster. Those that are trapped in shame and secrecy and fear they might be judged and evaluated are generally slow in getting to know themselves and have lesser benefits from the process.
THEY ARE REALISTIC
Clients that are able to set realistic expectations do better in therapy. They are patient and consistent in their inner work and take responsibility for their step by step action. At the opposite end, clients that want quick changes and are looking for immediate gratification tend to do a lot of talking and can set clear intentions, but struggle to implement the actions and see less or no progress in teh long run.
THEY ARE MINDFUL
People that live in the now more often have way more chances to do well in therapy. They are open to embrace awareness and they understand how they operate from different levels of consciousness. Clients that live mostly identified with their Tunnel Minds find it challenging to live in the “here and now” and tend to be reactive in life based on their old learned patterns of thinking and behaviours.
THEY ARE COURAGEOUS
Clients that permit themselves to connect with their vulnerable facets and confront their most deepest fears and desires end up having much better outcomes. People that have a tendency towards denial, suppression, rationalisation and other defence mechanisms take longer to understand themselves and spend more time in the transference space which, if used incorrectly, does not offer the opportunity for understanding, insight and catharsis.
You may want to know now if these attributes can be developed or not. I say they can and I feel that here the role of the therapist is crucial. A good therapist will display all the above atributes in their work as they have been already though the process of self-discovery, healing and personal growth themselves. They will share from their own experience as clients in therapy and create a safe space for exploration and connection which will give the client that holding and support absolutely necessary to intiate the process of transformation.
To learn more about this see how I work.